Bloggybit for Beltane 2010
This will ramble like fuck.
You have been warned.
I have made an utter fool of myself,
lost (or temporarily misplaced) my mind and soul,
and found Wisdom, and Life and Rebirth of Spirit
by nearly dying in a (giant) bucket.
I have had the best time ever. Yes indeedy.
The kindness of strangers helped me
sort out so much of the shit in my head.
Either I've been plonked right back on my Contacts,
or there was something funny in one of my drinks -
mysterious weirdness happened on the way home -
I think my friend's car-wot-I-was-in ended up behind the car
of someone I've probably put off of ever wanting to know me.
I'm pretty damn certain that we ended
up following them for a short while...
Either my psychic faculties have
opened enough to be useful again,
or I have gone mad and feel fine,
or there was something in the Orangeade...
I think it *did* happen though,
with knowledge of the conversation
that the two people in the car in front had.
Who needs spy equipment or extendable ears
when your mojo has come back?
I'm going to check with them whether it really happened...
I managed to not kill a stringy little creep,
and I managed to not be killed for being a plump creep...
My HolyDaying was so wonderful,
beautiful, magical, and all that.
Hooray for Iron Unicorns,
Travelling Cats and the people they own,
Freaky Incongruous Sunlit MORSMORDRE Clouds,
amusingly named Incense,
Lovely lovely people far better than I,
helping raise up folks like I be.
Arrr! Pirate Bunnies!
Oh - I saw an estate agent's sign,
the company name and message made me cackle.
Bob understands me, the Fortune Sausage knows me, Always...
Perhaps I have grown up a fair bit, at last.
Or not. I don't know. People tell me it's a bad idea
to make descisions when so tired,
but I have come to one truly sensible choice.
I can serve the Gods perfectly truly by the path
of the hearthfire as long as I'm doing it right.
I can try my very best to be a married pagan nun witch
to mirror, or follow after the manner of Logospilgrim
the married Christian monk woman who dresses as
a fictional wizard...
If I can promote love half as truly and deeply as she,
I will smile more, and so will all the other souls
I intersect and interact with (At some level, that's all of us!).
She inspires me, good people inspire me,
the Gods and their works inspire me,
Love inspires me, Beauty inspires me,
The Fount of these things is my AWEN.
Glory of Beauty
Unites The Fount and the Paths,
Merciful Love and Righteous Severity,
are our Blessings on the Paths We Walk,
for 'tis one Eternal Merripen Ride,
Until it's time to go Home.
I can serve as healer and priestess and witch without running away to France or Wales... I can serve from where I am,
love my neighbours, love my God,
serve Queen and Country in my way...
Great Bears and Hawks and Mists
can Drive and Drift as they will,
but I am in a life of penance.
I can glory in seeking righteousness,
I just beg that people tell me if I start becoming
a sanctimonious arsehole before it's too late.
I need the teaching of the monasteries of mysteries,
but to work my work close to the home...
Where the heart is is home, and our treasure.
Just starting to make my body from a squalid home
to a temple would be a pretty great work for me right now.
Actually, it feels more like a brothel.
I found me a Scabbers to go with LE, SS, LM and Dobby.
Yay Dobby =)
I have one of the Skulls from the Dragon's Nest.
I think I made a lot of new friends
that are well worth having.
These folks are kind to the weak and strong alike.
Where is the evil there?
To sum it up, I was whingy, confused,
going mad, bit by bit...
By being themselves, these people have helped me
see a bit clearer who I truly am,
and who I really belong to - MySelf and The Divine.
I know prolonged drinking on my part was
a damn fool's way to make it through
the Gathering, but, in Vino Veritas...
I can't believe I didn't think about
SS's Deathday until Monday morning.
I was too busy being desperate.
Ha. No more, no more...
Please, Gods, no more...
The Orgy-that-never-would-be was,
by its nature, cancelled, and it was
far too cold to run about naked.
Probably for the best.