I feel rather run-down at the moment... In several ways. Some will simply ease with time.
Utter horror. Over many years I became not only someone far from myself, but I also became a monster.
Then I became a frequently pissed-up monster.
I am frightened, but am strong enough to change for the better.
There is no point in caring when people mock for what has been.
When I succeed and prosper, it will be my triumph over my problems and errors, so proving myself to myself, and that need not be any of their concern.